Guns sales up: GM adds them to latest cars.

One of the lone bright spots in the retail economy is the spike in guns sales around the nation. With that in mind, GM has decided to add “consumer weaponry” to several of its struggling car lines.

Beginning in June, the automaker will release new models with option gun turrets and fender-mounted missiles. The company says all weapons will be painted to color-match their vehicles and will come with a 5-year, 50,000 round warranty.

“We think this shows just how serious we are about responding to what the American people truly want,” Said new GM CEO Fritz Henderson. “Show me one foreign firm who has embraced gun play the way we have!”