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Archive for September 2012

BREAKING: “Jesus was married. Wife drove him nuts…”

jesus wife marriedA newly revealed, papyrus fragment indicates that some early Christians might have believed that Jesus was married. The fragment, written in Coptic, a language of Egyptian Christians, says , “Jesus said to them, My wife is freaking driving me out of my mind. Give me another beer!”

While scholars still argue the point, a marriage might explain Jesus’ ultimate decision to be crucified.

Written by mytabloids

September 19, 2012 at 8:30 am

BREAKING: Santorum wins weekly “Duh” award!

santorum evangelicals vote iowaIn a speech before the Values Voters summit, Rick Santorum said that “smart people will never like us.” ¬†Well, DUH!

Christopher Gabney, who monitors “Stupid shit that people say every week” said that Santorum would be awarded his weekly “Duh” award for “Stating the obvious, in such an obvious way.”

“Clearly Rick has some sort of deep seeded dislike of smart people, which is why, years ago, he chose the Republican Party.”

Written by mytabloids

September 16, 2012 at 5:55 am