My Tabloids | Satire on the Mon

It's not true, they didn't come anywhere near my tabloids…

Breaking: Building stolen. Bear being sought.

longaberger yogi bear imageThe iconic corporate headquarters of the Longaberger Basket Company in Newark, Ohio was apparently stolen overnight.  Corporate officials were the first to discover the theft when they went to work on Monday, only to find the building, which is shaped like an actual basket, missing.

“We are stunned and saddened,” Said corporate spokeswoman Betsy Nelson.  “We only hope that whoever stole our basket understands how much it means to us, our customers and the members of the Newark, Ohio community.”

Police, meanwhile, are apparently following up on an anonymous tip that a large brown bear was seen in the area a day or two prior to the theft.  Police Chief Clayton Stone was quoted as saying, “This bear, well, if it is him, he is smarter than your average bear — but I’m confident we’ll have him on custody soon.”

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Written by mytabloids

August 28, 2012 at 7:54 am

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