My Tabloids | Satire on the Mon

It's not true, they didn't come anywhere near my tabloids…

Band manager says he was tortured for years….

gitmo_2Austin Cromwell, manager of the band “Ferret Slickers,” has filed suit in Federal Court, claiming that he was tortured for years, “Just like those Arab dudes at Gitmo.”

The gist of Cromwell’s complaint was set forth by his lawyer, Andy Spanadakos, and is strikingly similar to the complaints of many Guantanamo Bay detainees.

“Mr. Cromwell has been forced to listen to loud rock music for many thousands of hours. He has been deprived of sleep. On the rare occasion that he was allowed to sleep, it was only on uncomfortable beds in crummy motels. Furthermore, he has been forced to drink warm, flat beer, which he has a religious aversion to.”

Written by mytabloids

July 13, 2009 at 2:20 am

%d bloggers like this: