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“Stupidity Checkpoint” nabs 83,000 offenders.

vitterWhen the Louisiana State Police decided to become part of a new Federal education pilot program, they had no idea just how much it was going to tax their limited resources.

“We just didn’t see this comin’,” Said Officer Clyde Bertram. “I mean, over the course of a weekend, we had to ticket thousands of our fine citizens, just ’cause they couldn’t answer a few simple questions.”

The National Stupidity Assessment was included as a rider on a little-noticed bill and easily passed in both the House and Senate on a voice vote, possible because the Members didn’t understand what they were voting on. President Obama signed it into law just after his inauguration. First-term Senator David Vitter not only voted for the bill, but was caught at a Stupidity Checkpoint not far from his home in Metairie.

“We got somin’ like twenty-thousand people the very first day!” Officer Bertram added, “Traffic just about come to a standstill across this fine state!”

The Assessment is a bit like a shortened version of “Who Wants To Be A Millionaire,” using only the early “idiot” questions.

While the citizens of Louisiana who failed won’t face criminal charges or fines of any sort, they will be offered tutoring help through the President’s new “Stupid Stimulus Program.”


Written by mytabloids

June 29, 2009 at 2:40 am

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