My Tabloids | Satire on the Mon

It's not true, they didn't come anywhere near my tabloids…

NRA: We’re winning the war on innocent people!

nra_gunThe Binghamton, er…Pittsburgh slaughter is “one more step in our ongoing war on innocent people.” So says the NRA, who, immediately after the shootings, went on a PR offensive. “Thusfar we’re pretty pleased with the end result of our lobbying efforts.”

“Guns don’t kill people, people kill people” has been our mantra for 30 years and we see no reason to alter our position,” A spokesman said. “And we think our “war” has been much more successful than other similar efforts, such as the “war on poverty” and the “war on drugs. Hell, if you wanna win those wars….we can tell you in two words; hand guns!”

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