My Tabloids | Satire on the Mon

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Firing squad enlivens PirateFest!

firing_squadYoungsters of all ages were thrilled to find a new attraction at this year’s PirateFest;  a totally, for-real firing squad!  “We know that some fans have been a bit underwhelemed by the progress the Pirates have made in recent years,” said a happy PirateFest staffer, “So we wanted to offer our best fans a really cool interactive experience this time around.”

Late in the day, four Pirates (who had been voted on via the web and texting) were lined up in center field, wearing their brand new, redesigned uniforms — and were then shot by four lucky winners, who had been chosen at random from thousands of entries.

Said 14 year old Jason Pitts, “That was totally awesome.  He didn’t even try to make a play for the bullet…just like last season!”

As an added bonus, the winners were forever banned from attending or watching another Pirates game.

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Written by mytabloids

January 25, 2009 at 6:54 am

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