My Tabloids | Satire on the Mon

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Chief Justice, removed from Borg Collective, blows oath

roberts_borgA nation was stunned today when Chief Justice of the Supreme Court, Justice John Roberts, totally flubbed the Oath of Office as he presided over the Obama Inaugural.  Insider information, provided to us by a former Bush appointee, offers some explanation.

“Once noon came, and Bush was officially disconnected from the hive mind, Roberts didn’t have a clue what to do.” Said Melvin Standhope.  “You have to understand just how devastating that must of been for him and others in the Bush Administration.  They simply didn’t know what to say or do or think…as they’d never been asked to do that before.”

Another former staffer, who was frantically looking for a chip he thought had been implanted in his body several years earlier kept shouting, “Sleep, Data, sleep.”

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